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The Humormeister's Forum, Issue #00072
October 31, 2013

Welcome to the 72nd Humormeister's Forum edition

We've started the final stretch of 2013. The pace will soon get more hectic with the upcoming Christmas season.

It would be nice if we could take some of the commercialism out of the season and go back to a more relaxed, less stressful and happier Christmas season.

This time of year should be enjoyed, rather than be endured by so many. We should all plan for a happier, less stressful and more relaxed Christmas and make it the joyous time it is meant to be.

Funny quotes

Marriage is just a funny word for adopting an overgrown male child who cannot be handled by his parents anymore - Author unknown

Humor/laughter quotes

If you can't be content with what you have received, be thankful for what you escaped - Author unknown

The 1 Minute laugh

Yes, Nikola Tesla failed, getting 0 % on his exam which actually shows he wsas light years ahead of the vast mojority of humanity. See below how he answered gthe questions on the test.I would have given him 100

Q1. In which battle did Napoleon die. - "His last battle!"

Q2. Where was the declaration of Independence signed - "At the bottom of the page!"

Q3. River Ravi flows in which state - "Liquid!"

Q4. What is the main reason for divorce - "Marriage!"

Q5. What is the main reason for failure - "Exams!"

Q6. What can you never eat for breakfast - "Lunch & Dinner!"

Q7. What looks like half an apple - "The other half!"

Q8. If you throw a stone into the blue sea what will it become - "It will simply become wet!"

Q9. How can a man go 8 days without sleeping - "No problem, he sleeps at night!"

Q10. How can you lift an elephant with one hand - "You will never find an elphant that has only one hand!"

Q11. If you had 3 apples and 4 oranges in one hand and, what would you have - "Very large hands!"

Q12. If it took eight men to build a wall, how long would it take four men to build it - "No time at all, the wall is already built!"

Kids are funny!

Grossed out! 8 year old Stephanie to her mom, "Mom, when you and dad got married - when the priest said - now you may kiss the bride. Did you really have to kiss dad?" "Have to, I guess not - but I wanted to."

Stephanie replied - "Couldn`t you just 'high-fived' instead."

Feature article

How to inject happines into you life

Whether you are 18 or 88, there`s always time to change your possibly 'limiting beliefs' about happiness.

You can tap into your inner happiness starting this very day.

1. 'Accept yourself' - Don`t be critical of yourself. Learn to accept youirself as you are.

2. 'Happiness a state of mind' - No one can make you unhappy, if you decide that youi will be happy.

3. 'Take care of you health' - You need a healthy body to ensure a happy state of mind.

4.'Balance your life' - Learn to organize your tasks and responsibilities by setting and metting priorities.

5. 'Surround yourself with positive and happy people' - Avoid people who are unhappy and nagative, as they will direct your mind towards negative thinking.

6. 'Be grateful and thankful for what you have' - when you stop and think for a moment, we all have a lot to be thankful for.

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"If you lose your zest for laughter - you lose your zest for life!"

All or part of this newsletter may be reprinted with permission, provided that credit is given to the author and his website

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