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The Humormeister's Forum, Issue #00063
January 31, 2013

Welcome to the 63rd Humormeister's Forum edition

I receive many positive comments about my website. Many appreciate being reminded about the positive and healthy aspects of humor and laughter, while others use the website to lighten up friends or relatives who have fallen ill, or are going through difficult times in their life.

It is wonderful to receive this feedback. It makes me realize that the website affects many people in different, but certainly positive ways.

Funny Quotes "I have not seen anyone dying of laughter but I know millions who are dying because they are not laughing." - Dr. Madan Kataria

Humor/Laughter quotes

"The road to happiness is paved with humor and laughter." - Gerry Hopman

The 1 Minute laugh

The 10 commandments of marriage

1. Marriages are made in heaven. But then again, so is thunder and lighting.

2. If you want your wife to listen and pay strict attention to every word you say - talk in your sleep.

3. Marriage is grand...and divorce at least 100 grand.

4. Married life is about communication. In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens. In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens. In the third year, they both speak, and the neighbors listen.

5. When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one thing - either the car is new, or the wife is.

6. Marriage is when a man woman become as one. The trouble starts when they try to decide which one.

7.Before a marriage, a man will lie awake all night listening to what you have to say. After marriage, he will fall asleep before you finish.

8. Every man wants a wife who is beautiful, understanding, economical, and a good cook, but the law only allows one wife.

9. Marriage and love are purely a matter of chemistry. That is why one treats the other like toxic waste.

10. A man is incomplete until he is married. Aftwer that he is finished.

Humor from our richest humor resource......our kids

What is a grandparent? - as perceived by 8 year olds

  • Grandparents are a lady and a man who have no children of their own, they like other people
  • A grandfather is a man grandmother
  • Grandparents don't have to do anything except be there when we come to see them. They are so old, they shouldn't play hard or run. When they take us for walks, they slow down past things like pretty leaves and caterpillars
  • They never say - hurry up
  • Usually grandmothers are fat, but not too fat to tie my shoes
  • They wear glasses and funny underwear
  • They can take their teeth and gums out
  • Grandparents have to be smart.They have to answer qustions like 'Why isn't God nmarried?'
  • It's funny, when grandparents they bend over you hear gas leaks and they blame their dog

Feature article of the month

How to be happier and more balanced in life

In today's world, many of us are overwhelmed with what we have to face the minute we get up in the morning. We need to develop new ways to live, be happy, and stay balanced in our daily lives.

1. Start out the day being appreciative of the new day, the new opportunities of fulfillment that are available to you. An optimistic, happy mind, makes for a happy fulfilled day.

2. Choose something that you will change for the better today. Commit yourself to repeat this approach in future days.

3. Stop and smell the roses. A few times a day, take a break and take a deep breath. It will feel like a mini vacation. Allow yourself regular relaxation periods while you read, listen to you favorite music.

4. Learn to say "NO." If this is difficult for you, stand in front of the mirror and practice till your tongue bleeds.

5. Express yourself, doing somthing spontaneous and enjoyable. This can be dancing in the moonlight with your partner, or taking an unplanned trip into the country side.

6. Look after, take care of your physical and mental well-being. Eat nutritious most of the time. Exercise regularly, physically as well as mentally. Allow yourself time you spend by yourself.

You can now follow me on

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  • Wanted! Your funny stories, funny experiences! Use the 'Contact page' on the website for your feedback.

    If you lose your zest for laughter - you lose your zest for life!

    All or part of this newsletter may be reprinted with permission, provided that credit is given to the author and his website

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